It's been one year since I started my cooking-for-Axl blog so I thought I'd do a little assessment to see how it was working out for me. (I'd love to be able to say 'you', how it's working out for you, but so far 'you' have been a rather quiet bunch.)
Axl hit the road right after I picked him out of thin air to focus my cooking efforts on, and he's still traveling. That's given me a lot of opportunity to cook foods based on his locations. It was great fun reserching foreign foods, disecting the recipes and adding a few new techniques to my toolbox. I also found myself wondering what he was really eating. Is Axl an adventurous diner? Does he enjoy eating local cuisine or, after so many years of weird foods with questionable origins is he
safer content eating from the hospitality suite? I suspect that Axl is a man who is easy to please in the food department. He just strikes me as someone who enjoys food cooked simply and well. I base that on several clues I've gleaned from following his virtual ass all over the world. Supposedly his tour riders ask for roast chicken, filet mignon, salad and cheeseburgers. And Wonder Bread. Plus, he gave everybody on Jimmy Kimmel Live a Tommy Burger, didn't he? The man enjoys his food by the handful, and there's nothing wrong with that. I CAN DO THAT!
Cooking for Axl has allowed me the opportunity to host far more dinner parties than any normal person would. Calling up a few friends with the invitation for dinner and an aside of "oh, and I'm cooking for Axl tonite" brought out the ham in just about everybody. It was amusing to see my guests walk into the kitchen with one eye on the laptop and after being informed that the camera was rolling give a smile and a wave, and then go right about the business of giving me some great shit to work with. You're awesome, guys.
The birthday party we had for Mr. Rose was epic, and if I thought for one minute he'd appreciate an invitation (instead of thinking I'm a crazy stalker – something he seems to have in abundant supply) I'd have made sure he knew about the party in his honor. It was a hoot, made even better by the fact that everyone not only showed up but dressed for the occasion. Honestly, if my friends think I'm insane, they sure go out of their way to make me not notice.
What's really insane though is that somewhere in this world there is somebody who does not know what to do with leftover clams. Seriously. I have exactly one post about how to make pasta out of already cooked clams that gets a hit every single day. From all over the place. Unfortunately, I have no idea if my suggestion was utilized, how it turned out, or anything. But every day someone, somewhere, did a search on what to do with leftover clams and found my blog. I can only hope that I helped them make a meal out of a pile of bivalves that were destined for the trash bin. Bon Appetit, my friends.
I got a little, teensy glimpse into Axl's life during the past year as well. The man has achieved a level of celebrity that has completely transcended the fact that he's an actual person. The ugly, horrific things people say about him based on some stupid rumour they heard through some stupid pulp rag is apalling. Nobody, no matter how confident you are with youself, could withstand the outright venom that spews from the mouths of people who have NO IDEA if it's the truth or not. In one year's time I've gone from barely knowing who Axl Rose was, to defending him in public. Axl, dude, I got your back. And so does http://theresalotgoingon.wordpress.com/ just in case you need a few of us.
And, speaking of celebrity status, I've seen the Twitter posts from girls who are so obsessive about Axl that they beg, BEG, him to acknowlege them with a mention, a follow or, presumably, a marriage proposal. Frankly, they scare ME, and I'm not the one they're posting about twenty times a day with user names like MrsAxl and AxlsSweetChild. No wonder the man has a reputation as a recluse. All I can say is… you are safe with me. No, really. Come over anytime. I won't alert the media or pretend we're married or anything like that. But… you are on my list, just so you know. I had to bump Cpt. Jean-Luc Picard, but I think it will totally be worth it.
I've also suffered a devastating blow in my personal life with the loss of my mom. My antics throughout my life have amused more than concerned her, and she thought that Cooking For Axl was the most hilarious thing she'd ever heard of. I can only hope she is, at this moment, putting my blog in the hands of someone who will recognize my cooking potential and make me the next Food Network Star. Because MY MOM ROCKS.
I've been virtually introduced (that means I follow them on Twitter and they follow me. Or not.) to some good people who are on Axl's side, not the least beeing his team mates DJ Ashba and Bumblefoot. And Mrs. Bumblefoot. And his PR staff as well as the great people who head his fan clubs. You've all been super about my odd little hobby. Thanks for not alerting the authorities.
So all in all, it's been a fun year hitching a ride on Axl's star. I took a break for the last couple months while I got myself back to a reasonable weight, but I'm looking forward to another summer with Axl Rose as my co-pilot. I hope you have fun watching us cook/eat/party and I hope to hear from you (comments mean the world to bloggers, not to mention our Google rankings!)